Healing Through Creativity: Songwriting as my Therapy

Lyric video for Strange Blues by Esther Friedman

Sometimes I wonder why I keep writing songs. But the songs show up.

They write me when I’m struggling. Difficult feelings, confusing relationships, bafflement about our complicated, sometimes cruel and often contradictory world connect me to some invisible portal full of melody, rhythms, and lyrics.

For example, this song, "Strange Blues", rolled out after the October 7, 2023, attacks in Israel. I’m conflicted. I was shocked as protests seemed to support Hamas—a terrorist organization. Large masses blamed unarmed victims for being ambushed. I wondered:

“So, these mostly Israeli citizens (though not all) don’t matter? If so, is that because most of them are likely Jewish?”

I’m also horrified by the devastation in Gaza that continues today. So, the millions of Palestinian citizens living there don’t matter either?

As a child of the '70s, I remember parents and mentors preaching The Golden Rule — treat others as you wish to be treated. What happened to that?

I respond as a human. In principle, I don’t support destruction. I believe that humans are capable of decency. It seems so obvious. But this is the Gentle Soul’s dilemma: facing senseless cruelty, callousness, and greed—humans perpetrating inhumanity—and continuing to believe in goodness anyway.

I know there’s a middle ground that wishes the best for all, regardless of differences. I’m holding to it, even though general kindness seems unpopular right now.

Why is that? How is it that people are pushed so quickly—and easily—into an us vs. them mentality?

As I grappled (and still grapple) with those questions, the song fell out. It didn’t answer my questions, but it did reconnect me to my Eastern European and Jewish roots. It pushes me to start learning about Judaism, the Middle East, Eastern Europe, and Ukraine’s history (Thank you, Timothy Snyder).

It revealed in me an urgency to stay strong in that middle ground and maintain my personal faith amidst a world that increasingly demands extremes through external and skewed narratives.

I’m also conflicted about this post. Maybe transparency about politicized topics is inappropriate for a therapist? However, after letting a cult silence me with its toxic secrets, I reclaimed my voice—through songwriting, performing, and prose writing.

It felt great to literally take my voice back by rejecting “school’s” fear-imposed narrative. I can’t let fear take my voice away again. After all, I’m advocating for humanity. We need more humanity.

Songwriting was a critical component of my post-cult recovery. It’s helping me stay sane (as much as possible) right now. So, I share this song in hopes that, Gentle Souls, it inspires you to find and express your authentic voice—in whatever medium works for you.

Here are the lyrics to the song below.

"Strange Blues"

Strange blues words at bay

Strange blues can’t explain

Strange blues in my DNA

Family ghosts—something to say

VERSE 1

There’s a bitter wind

blowing through my soul

Voices of my kin

from places I don’t know …

Strange blues, you come through

All day long …

Mumbling alarm about a world gone wrong

CHORUS 2

Strange blues from far away

Haunt me night and day

Clamoring of my DNA

Family ghosts—something to say

VERSE 2

Prophecies emerge

Rising from the din …

I can’t make out the words

Just feel prickling of my skin

Strange blues, you rattle in my BONES

Sirens ring out from a long-gone shul

BRIDGE

Wish I believed in heaven

But that’s not my fate

When hell is in the making

Be hated or the one who hates

Us or them. Kill or die

Wrong or wrong. All the lies.

Miss the mark. Lose or lose.

Choices that aren’t choices

Giving me these blues …

(Short instrumental)

VERSE 3

I’m arguing with shadows.

Fighting with the dead

Phantoms sounding warnings

Chanting in my head

Strange blues, I only know

One thing that’s true:

When fear wins, we all lose

CHORUS 3

Strange things happen in strange days

I feel your prayers pump through my veins

Call it legacy, call it fate

Family ghosts—something to say