At some point in my life, I started noticing a pattern of behaviors, beliefs, and traits that I shared with certain people. Over time, I put them together into a profile.
Did you grow up hearing messages like:"You think too much..." " You're too sensitive..."
Did those messages make you feel defective and send you on a constant search for a way to dial down your emotions or turn off the flood of thoughts?
If so, you might be a Gentle Soul.
Are These Struggles Familiar?
Trusts Others, Doubts Self
Does your tendency to extend the benefit of the doubt to others often backfire? Have you noticed a pattern of trusting untrustworthy people, only to realize someone has manipulated you and leveraged your trust? Has this pattern made you question your ability to accurately assess people and situations? Has it worn on your self-confidence?
Emotionally, Overly Responsible
Does your hardwiring to give others the benefit of the doubt come so naturally that you assume everyone values mutual understanding? Some people are only interested in getting what they want. That mindset is almost inconceivable to you, which puts you at a disadvantage when dealing with pathologically selfish people.
Your efforts to resolve miscommunications or conflicts will never be enough. Your determination to fix problems with such a person will only exhaust you.
Idealistic Seeker, Mission-Driven
This combination of attributes—extending the benefit of the doubt and emotional over-responsibility—is driven by an esoteric principle: we are here on Earth to help each other.
Do you dream of a world that’s just and fair? Where no one goes hungry or homeless?Where every person has all they need to grow into their true potential?
Do you long to leave the world a better place than when you arrived?
Are These Characteristics So Inherent to You That You’ve Assumed Everyone Else Shares Them?
You Are Empathic – You feel other people’s emotions, sometimes before they do.
You Live for Deep Connection – Long talks, mutual understanding.
You Are Naturally an Emotional Caretaker – You’ve always been a listener, with an emotional understanding that goes beyond your years or experiences.
You Are Open-Minded and Curious – You genuinely want to know about people’s lives, beliefs, feelings, thoughts, and experiences.
You Tend to Overexplain – In the well-intended spirit of “Maybe if we understand each other...” you have shared too much, only to have someone weaponize your personal and vulnerable information. In hindsight, you realize you should have protected yourself instead of providing "data" to be mined and used against you.
You Are Wired to Create and Collaborate – Collaboration, connection, and creativity inspire you. These efforts breathe life into your life. Despite society being largely organized around winning and losing, competition is not your dominant mode of operation. It doesn’t motivate you, and you don’t think about it that much.
Gentle Souls, We’re Living in a Mean Time.
Inhumanity, indecency, cruelty, greed, and callousness have taken center stage. Ironically, some evangelical “Christians” call empathy sinful.
My friends, characterizing kindness as a “sin” is the classic example of gaslighting.
So, first thing: THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.
Don’t change.
You don’t “think too much.” You are thoughtful, and that is good. You can’t dial down the volume of your thoughts, and you shouldn’t.
You’re not “too sensitive.” You are sensitive, compassionate, and kind. We need more compassion and kindness, not less.
The world needs more thoughtfulness, kindness, and compassion—not less.
We are challenged to accept our hardwiring as Gentle Souls.We are challenged to recalibrate long-held beliefs that empathy and thoughtfulness are “defects.”We are challenged to see these attributes as gifts we can offer—while protecting them from social parasites.
Some will drain the life out of us.We must protect our time, energy, and focus as precious commodities that can, eventually, elevate humankind—as long as we safeguard them from being hijacked.
So, Gentle Souls…
Go out and live your values.
When you realize someone is untrustworthy, pump the brakes, step back, change your mind, and protect yourself.
Inhale, exhale. ~Esther
Esther Friedman
Author of The Gentle Souls Revolution
Website: gentlesoulsrevolution.com
Buy the book: https://a.co/d/4fLuoa0
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